Well, perhaps some of our fears have been faced in the last few days. Just got to help a friend face one and it was amazing. Hope no one is trying to do this alone--it's far easier and much more fun if you get some people to tag along and cheer you on. Personally, I'm finding myself in a fear facing mindset that causes me to do lots of little things that scare me a little, as opposed to doing a few things that scare me a lot. What exactly?
Well here are a few of them:
1. admitted defeat
2. called an old friend
3. cried in front of someone
4. decided to live in the everyday instead of escaping to the next big adventure I wasn't ready for
5. began to try living in the unconditional love of God that is not dependent upon my contribution to society...started by doing absolutely nothing on Sunday--which I now highly recommend.
(okay, maybe these weren't such little fears, but they felt smaller than the terror that fills me at the thought of riding a rollercoaster)
So my question is, anyone got a story to share? Or are you scared to tell it?
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THE GUTS OF THE OPERATION
"If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because He first loved us."
1 John 4:15-18
1 John 4:15-18
3 comments:
Thanks for spurring me on to think more deeply about not living in fear. I don't have any of the obvious fears...I like clowns, don't mind small spaces, not afraid of germs, and I love roller coasters, but I do want to take the time to think deeply about what parts of me are driven by fear instead of love.
The past couple of months have been a huge eye-opener for me. It never occured to me before I read your post that maybe fear does have something to do with it. My biggest fear at this point: committing myself to something that either isn't the truth, or that doesn't suit me. The only thing worse than that would be to not recognize the truth and shun it. I'm liberal enough to admit that "truth" is a very subjective term. The problem is that I don't want it to be! I wanted the Orthodox Church to be the fullness of truth. I might be, I don't know. But to be a part of it, I'd have to commit myself to it 100%, building a religious and cultural wall between me and my non-Orthodox friends and family. Sorry, I'm "different" enough as it is. So now I've had to get to know myself as someone who doesn't have a church home (I just can't go back to being Baptist, and I'm not particularly impressed with other Protestants or Catholics either). I've always been the good church boy. I can't believe I'm admitting this on a blog that more people than my beloved friend Dana are going to see: I've lived the past two months in solid fear that since "taking a break" from Orthodoxy and beginning to "look around", I've in fact locked myself in a spiritual limbo and that I'm too picky and idiosyncratic to ever really get out. If I can't be Orthodox, then what?
Hey brotha Dan! Thanks for your thoughts. An interesting book that you might like to read: Generous Orthodoxy by Brian McLaren. I'm only half through--sort of read a little and come back later after I've had time to mull over it.
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